Saturday, January 17, 2009

having a good day, and then all of a sudden, u had to go and ruin my childhood, y u gotta do that honky?

soo basicially, amazing. Lets see, start, ummmm....where to start, i think tuesday? tuesday. Nothing really happened, other than played water polo again, and it was freakin amazing, but i dont exactly know if im going to actually play, cause i reall ydont think im good enough for the team :P. Fail. Oh well....Wendsday was free pie night, and with my soul mate Kelly! she fit in with the group uber well! she was extra funny, and soo much fun to chill with. I picked a good soul mate :D. Thennnn, thursday, nothing really happened at all, i think i hung out with jessie, but i dont remember cause it was boring, and i didnt do much other than write a paper and do some math, well not really math, but ya knowwww. Then Friddayyy, intresting. Missed some shit, thats all that needs to be said, but i did do some bonding with Will on Fri, yayayayay! i dont hate that kid anymore! huzzahhh!!!

Theennn, this morning Jessie took all these modeling photos of me, and they were amazing and i was all, ur amazing, so now i just gotta submit them and itll be good. TTTThhhhennn, we went to big kid park, not as amazing as it sounded, but still, jessie and i got some more shots, and poor jenn wasnt feeling good, so we took her home and watched never ending story.....bascially, most perverted thing ever!!!! i was so upset, my childhood video was creepy and perverted, and i was all like, y isnt this a pg13 movie, its got freakin boobs in ittt!!!come on!!!! and then my lucky dragon turned out to be a creeper, worst childhood ever basically. So sad. Yea, sory for not updating this properly, with all my crazy detail and shit. But im lazy, and my jacket cam in the mail today! so i have to go celebrate, peace!

Saturday, January 10, 2009

Working Gears come togther

So.........its been a longggg week. Feels like an entire month has pasted, but its only been a week. Time is a fickle mistress, freakin time, make up ur mind woman!!! Lets seeeeee, where to start. Lets start with wensday, cause idk where i left off on this thing, and wend. was interesting. Lets seeeee, to start off the day, i woke up, that usually has to happen, occasionally it doesnt, but i dont remember that part. Went to AVS 11, and then calc, fun shit, not really......then went to lunch with the gang, u should all kno who that is by now....then went to Writing, stupid class, dont even kno why i dont just retake the damn test, cause i would sooooo ace it now that i know what they want....w/e. then then then. we went for pie. Free pie nights are the best!!! love free pie nights.

Ate lots of pie, and different pies, and loved them all. AMAZING!!! i also had a coffee, which was a really bad idea because i decided i was gunna work out after pie......i kinda threw up all the coffee and pie after i ran a quick mile. Thus ending my work outs till present. XP. It upset my stomach sooo much, but im going to get back on the wagon starting tomorrow, good stuff. Then after i was all sicky sick, i went back to jenn's and jessie's and chilled there for like 10 min, fell on the floor, and fell asleep underneath jessies bed for like 2 hours.......best 2 hours ever. I slept sooo well. I was dead after that mile, and that nap was just what i needed. Then jessie and jenn pulled me out from underneath the bed....no longer was eddie happily asleep, no longer was eddie entranced in the lovely state that blurs the line between fantasy and fiction, no longer was eddie dancing on the delicate glass fragments of dreams from another world. No, eddie was not gently drifted from the magical place of utter fancy, but ripped out from the womb!!!! I was not happy, but too drunk from being ripped out of my state of joy to notice, so i wandered back to my place and crashed till my 7:30 class, and then went back to bed after it ended. I was really upset about being awake.

Thennnnn, on Thursday, i ate lunch with the Jenn in tecero.....it was weird. It wasnt REALLY awkward, just kinda, mostly cause jenn and i are not usually left alone with one another, and shes really awkward with most boys.....but i think it was ok, we talked about this and that, nice little chit chat, couldnt really tell what jenn was thinking when she was drifting off into her world of lala, but it wasnt menacing, so i was fine with it. Then she went to class like 3 hours later, and i chilled afterward. Then, went to dinner with the whole gang, minus jessie but plus will and evan, jessie was doing yoga with jane, and when i escorted her to the arc, i left my keys there!!! but at the time i didnt kno, so when i found out they were lost, i was freakin out and then i didnt find them till the next day, and that was after i like called all these places and went wandering around looking for them on Thursday night, but thats more of a side story. After dinner, jenn and sarah had sorority junk, and so i ate dinner again with jessie, it was good fun eating dinner twice. Then, went up to wills room and watched a rerun of the office, and then 30 rock. I am beginning to like will more because he is a guy, and there are no other guys in the group, so i cant talk guy stuff with, soooo, i think im gunnna try and not dislike him more....try, its not like hes a bad guy, there is simply something i dont like about him.....i feel bad because i pick at him all the time, and he really doesnt deserve it, buttttttttttt, there is just something i cant place my finger on ittt thoughhhh!! sorry will.

So after freaking out all Thursday night, i get up on fri and go to classes, and then go to lunch with the gang plus leah in tecero, and then leah takes us horseback riding!!! it was sooo much fun!!! i had never riden a horse b4, and i lovvvve luther!!! he is sooo sweet, and cuteeee, and i love horses!!!!!!! and then leah was all, im getting free room and bored for working at the horse barn, and i was all, i want free room and bored!!!!! so i was all, hook me upppp!! and so we went to the office to ask about the applications, but they rnt up yet, and now im going with leah on monday/ tues, to talk to Holly, person who runs this stuff, to sign up to shadow leah and learn how to feed the horses!! im super excited to work with the horses, even though i have heard from EVERYONE that horse girls are BITCHES!!!!! i have been warned, but im a big boy, i can handle myself. and the free room is worth it, i NEED THIS! so im gunna start working there and then be all like smoozing and stuff. hopefully :D, but anyway, after horseback riding i went to class, wrote an essay, no problem for the amazing writer eddie! but i kinda gave up at the end and was all, i dont even care, but the essay isnt graded, so i didnt care, it just had to be 2 pages, single or double spaced, and mine was single, so i just gave up at the end, enh. Then tyhen then then then, I FOUND MY KEYSSSS!! there they were in the arc lost and found!!! HUZZAH, made my day. So i celebrated by going to dinner with jess and sarah not jenn, she was gone, and all that jazz, then went back on my bike, which i had to leave in gmore because i had lost my keys. Then went out to party the rest of night with some friends out there in Cuarto, u kno who r ;D.

Thennnnn, i went all out and about today, doing stuff, nothing really exciting or worth writing. Cam back and was all JESSIE!!! DINNER AND BADMITTEN!! then sarah was all, basketball game. And i was like, i dont like basketball. I got outvoted, so i ended up going to the basketball game thinking i would be able to pretend to be into it for like half of it, FAILED!!! idk y, butttt i just cant watch sports, that dont involve water, soo boring. And sarah was being all bitchy and saying that if i wasnt interested to leave, but i was trying to be a good friend and hang out with them and do what they want, so i cussed her out, thatll teach her to mess!!! i was also really grumpy for some odd reason......dont kno y, so i left, and im soo tired i dont wanna go out partyin, soo im here typing on my computer on a sat night, and im ok with it, cause im just tooo tired to do anything else :D.

Soooo now that only leaves us with the future. tomorrow the game plan is to do hw, and laundry, and get those other two packages that never freakin came!!!! im gunna avoid the gang tomorrow, i need a break from the on going intimacy that they create, im getting too attached to them, not really, i think i just need some space from everyone for a day or two, eddie time. Theennnnn, monday, classes, and all that jazz, not really anything too in particular, maybe ill take up the water polo teams offer to go to play indoor soccer, prob not. Then tues=death, ughgh, and i have water polo, im kinda excited? ill just make sure im more agressive, and not afraid to say im gunna leave at 8, sall good. But i think im gunna stick with it. and then the rest of the week will prob go as according to plan with a variation here or there, but nothing crazy like angels from heaven escorting me to go exploring up in the great beyond, if that happens, im pretty sure, that would be freakin boss. Basically.

So duck ur head, and hold ur breathe, and ram through that glass door that has been holding you back from living. Its ur life, live it well, i did it, and it was worth the cuts that the glass gave me :D

Wednesday, January 7, 2009

HOSSSSSSSS

Sooooo, i now kno why by blogs are soooo long, its because i dont update this thing enough XP. Lets seeee. Lets start back Thursday. Nothing too crazy, everyone at bakers square remembered me.......crazy.

Then Firday, went back to the dorms, and unpacked, took the writing test, failed because i didnt know what they wanted, i could probably pass if i took it again, but i wont, just want to take the class and get it over with. The rest of friday was boring.

Saterday, Jenn and Jess came back. We chilled for a while, i left early so they could have fun together. then Sunday, went out and chilled with Micheline, had a good time.\

Monday, school started. Avian Science is interesting.......no more needs to be said. Then rushing off to math, the new teacher is a biologist.......making the class about 20 times harder all of a sudden. Not so much fun. Then English.....SUCKS! everyone there is as dumb as a freakin rock, a rock ppl, a rock. Stupid people. But there is one kid, whose a swimmer, i can talk to him.....not tooo bad.

Tuesday, class early, not so bad. I can wake up earlier than most, so im ok with 7:30 class. But then with the lab right after it, especially when i hadent read the lab yet because they hadnt told us to, SUCKS BALLS!!! it really sucked. ummmmm, then went to math review session. New TA seems to know what hes talking about, but i dont like him, theres something about him i dont like about him, im sure ill figure out what i dont like soon. Then water polo practice. Freaking crazy! The guys didnt know i had noo idea how to play, so they just threw me in there, and i started to take a swing at it. I was really shy, and i was afraid to be agressive, but the other guys werent. So, that helped a little bit. They are all really nice, and friendly, and really lax. I cant wait to try again, i just feel bad i really suck at it, and my team has to suffer for it :P. But i cant wait to try it again

Thursday, January 1, 2009

RAWR

Soo, basically, ive come to many conclusions. Let us start with the beginning. I am done with swimming, competitively. I will still swim on my own here and there, but really? im kinda over the entire kill your body with people you barely know, are younger than you, and not really in the same stage of life as me. I am not saying the kids i swim with are immature, they may be very mature, i really dont know them that well, the simply arent in the same stage of life as me. I am on my own, sorting out my personality disorders and all. Theyre mostly in high school. So, yea, im done. I was going to try out in march, for the college team, but then i weighed the consequences and benefits of it all, and i decided that i can find equally amazing ppl playing water polo, or kendo, or some other crazy club. There is so much I want to do now that I have all these options, i am also thinking of going to take some pictures and go model casting to find an agent. Easy money? i think so. I think ill find an agent, im pretty good looking ;), but im pretty sure im not gunna get the first couple i go to, but that is life. So beyond major news of changing my life dramatically, I have also chilled significantly from the last blog. So I got Bs, not the end of the world? Im still shooting for vet school, and if not, ive got a pretty good fall back, i really want to do animal research, probably exotic, so after a year or so, if vet school isnt looking so hot, ill transfer to wild life preservation or something to that affect. I am an utterly lucky kid, with lots of talents, and i am so ready to explore all of them :D. Yea, so that thats basically the major chunk of my life right now. I shattered who i was, and picked up the pieces i liked and left the rest.

Speaking of leaving without looking back, my last swim practice was interesting. I was at clippers at the time (because i was still visiting in MD at the time, but im home now in Davis) and i was doing the set, and i was doing well, but then i decided to get out to go to the bathroom, and then i decided i dont need anything else in there anymore, so i got my stuff and left. All i had was my goggles, i left everything else in there, and I drove away without ever looking back. I am excited to be done, and I have no regrets about my decision, or any decision i made concerning swimming. So, yea, that was an interesting moment, i think i did a similar thing when i graduated high school. I remember, when everyone left the building for the last time, and everyone was hugging and crying and saying their goodbyes, and i just walked right out, got im my car and drove away, and didnt look back. Another reason it was weird visting all my old teachers in RH, i left that place, with no intention to return.....oh well, its nice to gloat that i am free from that prison. Sorry to everyone who loved high school, but i was in a prison, i could never say what i thought, because no one cared anyway, and i never really got to do what I wanted to do.....so yea, college is amazing, i dont want it end right now. But who am i to control time? :P

Other than that we will get into the petty details. Lets seee.....i forgot where i left off, i think it was after christmas. Yea, ok, lets see, went to Jesersy with the family to see dads family. That is always an interesting experience. For you see, some people think i am brutually honest, and i have a new york attitude, not i say no. Compared to my family, i am a small white maryland boy. They are brutual, and you always have to about your wits when with them, I love them to death, and it really an experience everyone needs to experience, just make sure you come prepared with thick skin, and ammunition on the tips of your tongue. But over all it was a fun night, and the drive home is always enjoyable for me, mostly because i am not driving.

Thennnn, Sunday, we hit the road at about 9 ish, got to Clarksville, at about 2ish, and then i hung out with Kendrick, ate with his family, played video games, and watched eagle eye (lame, not happy about the super computer, sorry if i ruined it?). It is so weird because they do everything as a family, and i have been fussed into it, like a metal alloy, i am mixed into it, not simply a lump on the side. Its nice to know that I will always have them to fall on. But they are so much different than my family. My family is so much more reserved, and we have much more subtle meanings with our gestures, expressions, and other things. Kendrick's family are completely open with one another, i could never image lying to any of them, ever. But with my family, when i was home, not really anymore not that im at college, i was calculating, manipulative, and i was hands down the best lair in the house. Alot has changed. I really dont do that anymore, well, i am calculating, and manipulative, but i dont lie. No need for it really. But anyway, thats another story, for another time....

Sooo, then we move to Monday....Monday, lemme think. I really dont remember it, so it must not have been too important. But i do remember my mom and i went out late to get shoes, nice ones, and we had a nice chat. We analyzed my mind set and personality, and compared it to the families. It turns out, I am weird. Most men look for a problem and solve it. That is how they look at life. It is a gaint problem, and they were made to solve a certain problem, and go about solving it. Women do things differently. They find the problem, and then they analyze it, see possible outcomes, and interpret what the best choice is, and then worry about it (aka think wayyy too much). Apparently I do both. I am a problem solver, and I can solve problems without a problem, but then, i doubt my answer, and then over think it, and i get into the women territory. Normally I would be proud to an exception to any rule; however, this is not a good thing. It kind of sucks actually. My gut instict tells me something, and its usually right, but I have a problem listening to it because of my need for approval....i think im making progress on that, finding that sometimes, i really dont need the approval of other ppl, and i need to do things for me, and no one else. Obviously this came about when deciding to quit swimming. I had no idea what i was going to do, oh!!!! and i remember i had gone to the gym with Kim earlier telling me of how shes done swimming, and fucked up her body in college swimming, and that realy made me think, do i need to do college swimming? I mean the only reason i swam was for college, and for the ppl. And since Jeff helped me NONE! when deciding on a college, and whether or not to swim, i got in on my own, and i got far far away. So, what was i holding onto? I discussed this with my mom, but i was obviously hesitant, and let the massive amount of thought to come, i really shouldnt do that, a skill Jenn has mastered, and my mom and i chewed on that for a while.

from :D. So that was a fun time. Then I went It was the next day where i came up with the answer, I decided I was done. But it wasnt until later in the day, but it was before practice in the afternoon. I didnt go to morning practice, and then....what did i do during the day?.....oh yea! i replaced the not so wonderful sleeveless shirt mommom gave me for christmas for a MD jacket, and a fancy regular jacket that is much more my style. But im excited, i never has a MD jacket, and im proud of the hoedunk little state imot practice, and then left after like an hour and half, and never looked back. I feel bad for ditching naka though :( poor kid. Love him. Then I hung out with morgan, went to Ruby Tuesdays, and saw spirt aAGAIN! and you know how sometimes during movies uve seen twice u get bored in some scenes, no. Not spirt, it was sooooo amazing. Yea, amazing.

Then Wendsday, a fun day. Started with Kendricking, and apprently Cameroning at lunch. We went to quodoba. I t thought it would be all awkward with Cameron, nawwww, he is a cool kid, I put the approval stamp on him. I remember he started off REALLY shy when i was driving Kendrick to BoA, and he was in the car alone with me, he didnt talk much, and i tried to lighten the mood, but he was just awkward, but then when we got to quodoba, and then Borders, he loosened up. Hes a good replacement. Any who, i thus proceeded to asy goodbi to everyone, it was hard, cause i really like my second family, although i was seriously jealous that they busted out the blow up mattress for cameron, and i always get he couch, or the floor :P. Enh, I hear they ask about me all the time though, so thats nice to know :D. Then went to quodoba again with Erica Suter, shes amazing, and shes doing well, and it was god to see her....and all that ;). Then went to a family new years eve party, thank god it ended at 8, i was sooo tired. But still went out, and packed till like 11ish.

Plane left at 8, got here at 12, read an entire book, The Subtle Knife by Phillip Pullman havent read it? go read the golden compass, then get that book, its worth reading. Then went to the hotel, getting ready for my exam tomorrow. Excited to home, i missed it, alot. Thats all for now, sorry, damn, my updates are too fucking long